I'm Sorry, Pa. But...

Hi Pa.

I wouldn't have been able to sleep before writing this. First of all, I'm really sorry at raising my voice at you earlier. I never should have done that, and I'm really sorry. I know you want the best for me and always mean well. I guess I got frustrated because it was the third time in as many days that you seem to be telling me to walk out on the job.

I want to give this job a chance because:
a) although it's tiring as I'm on my feet a lot, I think that it's fun meeting people from all over the world, and very beneficial for my future travels.
b) I'm learning a lot as I've never held a service-oriented job before, and the operation is meant to be one-man. As of now, I've learnt about tact in front of customers, the importance of knowing what I need to know in front of them, how the administration of such an operation is run, their business practices and some of their little business secrets.
c) it's the only place that invited me for an interview, out of the 40-50 resumes I sent in January. The insurance company doesn't count because they took my resume off an online job portal.
d) it's able to suit my school schedule.
e) it's something different on my resume. It may or may not be relevant to my future jobs, but at least it will make people sit up and notice. For interviews, it would let me give unique examples of my strengths, letting me stand out from other candidates.

About the housekeeping issue, I will take a wait-and-see approach. I WILL voice my unwillingness if I feel that it is too often, but right now it does not bother me because:
a) they have employed part-time staff to come in to do the housekeeping, and I have seen them on the 2nd and 3rd day, the same 2 people for both days.
b) I have been told that in my job scope, I only need to help out if they are sick, and have been assured that it is not common. And I accept this as part of my job, subject to its frequency. As a promise to both of us, I WILL make noise if it is more than once a month.
c) I believe the housekeeping on the first day was a work-attitude assessment; another employee has told me that everyone's first day involved housekeeping. And I believe I passed with flying colours.

About the contract and payday issue, actually I have planned to bring it up after my OJT ended, which would be tomorrow; they mentioned that $5/hr was just the starting rate and they would increase it based on performance. I planned to ask them about the contract, insurance coverage (if any) and payment mode, but asking about the payday didn't occur to me, so thanks for telling me about it. During the interview, they did tell me that CPF would be included in the pay (13% from employer) and after every day, I sign a time in/time out sheet.

If I am unhappy with the contract or the job, I will walk out without any qualms. And in any case I do not think I've wasted my time as I'm learning so much. But I also would like to give this job a proper chance and see what it has to offer fully.

And if I didn't have this job, I'd still be looking for one, either until I found a suitable one, or until 1 month before my exams. This is because I can't stand having nothing to do for the majority of my time. For the most of January I was very bored and listless, just passing day-by-day. I don't want to live like that; I want to live my life to the fullest. Having a job gives me a sense of purpose, some form of discipline to get me out of bed instead of sleeping the days away, and ironically, better time-management since it takes up part of the once-endless amount I had. Since free time is now more limited, I would put it to better use, instead of procrastinating.

And if I had the notion of being a manager straightaway after graduation, I wouldn't have taken up this job. In a way, this job enables me to see what front-line staff, admin staff and housekeeping staff have to go through, teaching me to emphatise with them, not to look down on them just because they do a "lesser" job, because it's still not easy to do. I know that to be a successful manager or boss, you need to understand what those under you go through everyday, and that is what I plan to learn for the 1st few years of my working life.

Being a manager is just my mid-term goal. In the short-term I know that only entry-level positions will be available to me, and I take this willingly because they are opportunities to learn and grow, and because this is what everyone has to go through, how the world works. The "manager" vision is a goal I want to reach, a strong driving source of motivation for the 1st few years. It is not an obsession, nor is it a destination. It is merely a checkpoint on a long journey ahead, the next one after graduation.

And as a hiring manager, what would you think of a newly hired employee if he, a young man of 25yrs, told you he wanted to quit because his father didn't approve of his job?

Pa, I know you are looking out for me and want to make sure I'm alright. And I will be. I know it's a big scary world out there, so all the more I need that personal experience in dealing with it. How would I be able to advise my kids on the life lessons I learnt if I was sheltered from them? (But if they're anything like me, they probably wouldn't listen either.)

If some experiences turn out to be bad ones, it's ok, because I will learn from them and know what (not) to do next time, because I learnt them myself. And from whatever bad experiences, I will always, always bounce back. I've already suffered so many setbacks in NS and NTU, grown so much as a person because/in spite of them. A close fren told me that the present me and the one he first knew in NTU 2001 are very different, in a good way.

The road ahead is still long, and I might stumble and fall, or I might lose my way. But it's ok because I will get up again, I will find my way again, one way or another. And it's ok because when that happens, I will learn life lessons, and I will learn them truly well, because I learnt them myself.

I know you care for me more than I will ever understand until I become a father myself, but I feel that it's time for me to explore the big, bad world, try out new horizons and lose sight of shores. And I will come back and tell you all about it.


Your loving son,
XX