Giving Answers

I've turned down 2 x'mas appts (a rarity, i might add (turning appts down, not x'mas appts.)) for todae and tml.

i'm not "mourning" in a sense that my depressive period is over... a short 2 days, partly thanx to a day spent outside with kitty. being home alone helps, but only for the inital stage. when its time to get over it, fresh air(con) is good.

i've turned them down coz within these gatherings, there are ppl who i do not owe answers to, esp to one particular question i know will pop out. these ppl were frens of a tainted past, now casual acquaintances at most. or those who have always been nothing more than acquaintances.

a few frens have already asked me that question over msn - the close frens out of goodwill, and hopefully the not-so-close ones too. But it is the wrong question to ask, so i do not give any answers.

but face-to-face is different. questions asked face-to-face are more difficult to leave hanging without answers, especially when repeatedly asked. so one of two outcomes wld happen:
a) i still do not give answers - leading to the question repeated, making everyone curious and getting me irritated.
b) i snap the answer out - leading to the atmosphere being tense and everyone uneasy.
so i choose to not make them happen.

so why is it the wrong question? coz i will get irritated and pissed. and on hearing the answer, ppl will start offering meaningless statements meant to comfort - which i do not need. or worse, attempt to make the situation humourous - which i do not think it is so. especially from ppl who are not impt to me.

so don't take offense if i don't go to your gathering. it's just that the combination of some ppl and some questions wld ruin the evening for everyone. (i quite power hor? can ruin it for everyone. haha) and don't worry. if u read this, u're not likely to be unimportant to me. but still, the wrong questions will not get u answers.

someone did ask me the right question. but i volunteered the answer without the question first because she went thru the exact same thing before. that's probably how she knew wat the right question was.

anyway, i'm still going for a x'mas gathering on sundae with a grp of close frens. not bcoz all of them are close enuff to ask the wrong question, but coz they're close enuff to not ask it.